At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize