apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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