i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your cock deserves a montage
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
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