that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize