being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Randomize
