this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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