Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I look better un-naked...
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
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