you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Blood and glitter go together right?
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
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