There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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