I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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