There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Randomize
