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ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
