Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
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