whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Let's get the cat blown out
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
