chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
Randomize