I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Randomize
