Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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