**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
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