He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Randomize
