If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Randomize
