The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Randomize