You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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