please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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