I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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