I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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