There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
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