apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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