i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
