Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Randomize
