Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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