He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
