So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Randomize
