True but thats because hes a fetus.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
