she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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