What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the prime rib incident all over again
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
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