Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(843): View more from South Carolina

so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger

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(518): View more from New York

True or false: I did not bring home a 28 year old last night.

(1-518): View more from New York

True? Did she teach you things?

(518): View more from New York

She taught me the meaning of awkward goodbyes at 530 am.

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(920): View more from Wisconsin

Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.

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(406): View more from Montana

I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex

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