I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
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