please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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