did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
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