rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Barsexuality is the new black.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Best friends brother. Beat that.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize
