in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
