Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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