420 ftw
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
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