We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
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