Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
