I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
