awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
you mean i was at the winter classic?
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
