Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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