What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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