He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Randomize